The ecstatic bozos

Drug ClownImagine you’ve built your drug business from the ground up, securing the manufacturing and distribution systems and building a firm customer base from scratch. You and your two partners are living in a home from which the drugs are distributed, a drug warehouse for your prosperous business that has an inventory of 107,000 ecstasy pills (valued at a cool $1 million) and 170 grams of cocaine. Life is good.

But one morning at 7:20 am, after a full evening of dedicated alcohol consumption you return home to your residential drug warehouse in the 4300 block of Nanaimo Street in Vancouver and discover you’ve lost your house keys. The question at this point is “What to do next” keeping in mind that your house is chock full of highly illegal drugs. Here’s your choices:

  1. Call one of your two partners and request their help
  2. Go to a friend’s home until one of your two partners returns to the house and can let you in
  3. Kick the door in

That scenario played out on Wednesday December 9 after the sleeping partners assumed they were the victims of a home invasion after their front door was kicked in by their drunken, moronic, key-less partner. These clowns tend to be a bit paranoid when they’re sitting on a pile of drugs and assumed their competitors were attempting to level the playing field by stealing their stock. A bad assumption. They called the police. A bad decision.

When police arrived a male walked out the front door and was taken into custody. A second man inside also was detained and, after obtaining a search warrant, the police re-entered the home and discovered the contraband pills and cocaine. Police work is easy when the clowns that are breaking the law are as intelligent as a soap dish.

Olympic EcstasyCharges are pending against the two men, aged 27 and 28 who were released with a number of conditions. An interesting note is that some of the ecstasy pills were imprinted with the Olympic rings. I wonder how long until VANOC slaps these idiots with a copyright infringement lawsuit. May I suggest a contra deal?

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