Tweedsmuir Twits

Facebook sucks at the best of times. It reaches a new level of suck when a few teenage horn-dogs flagrantly advertise their intention on a Facebook page to bed Grade 8 school girls. Such was the case with students at Lord Tweedsmuir High School in Cloverdale.

This industrious group of mouth-breathing chronic masturbators posted their intentions on Facebook for all to see which, not surprisingly, came to the attention of school administrators. And you can imagine how they reacted. No, they didn’t take the offenders aside, lecture them about bad behaviour, order them to remove the page and call it a day. Contrary to what would have happened in my day, all hell broke loose. In these days of touchy-feely political correctness, Surrey school officials contacted the RCMP and alerted the parents of hundreds of children at Lord Tweedsmuir Secondary School. All that because a few horny goofballs posted their impossible dream on a social networking site. And don’t you think that the RCMP have better things to do than lecture horny teenagers about controlling their feral libido?

The horn-dogs in questions encouraged grade 11 and 12 boys to seduce Grade 8 girls and become part of their LGS Club (which laughingly stands for ‘Little Girl Slayers‘). Yeah, right guys. I can only imagine the participants likelihood of actually doing the nasty with anyone or anything other than an artfully carved cantaloupe.

Someone blew the whistle and reported the boys cheesy web page which inspired knee-jerk officials to call in Anita Roberts, founder of SafeTeen to counsel 150 Grade 8 girls. Counsel them about what? That young guys will try to get into their pants? I defy you to show me any Grade 8 girl that isn’t acutely aware of that fact and if you manage to find one, I will personally submit her name to the Vatican for sainthood. Or at least suggest she get some face time on the next Girls Gone Wild video.

Ms. Roberts, whom I’m guessing is a barrel of laughs at a stag party, said “To have something like ‘Little Girl Slayers’ is such a virulent title, and it represents the macho competition of notches on the belt. It’s young men who buy into those stereotypes, and their own self-esteem is broken enough that they feel the need to exert this kind of power and control over more vulnerable people.” What a pile of horse shit.

My message to Anita Roberts and those like her is this: Young guys are mostly immature and horny. They like to appear to their peers as being much, much more sexually active than they really are or ever hope to be. Young guys are full of bravado and think the sun rises and sets directly from their butt-holes. Young guys are, for the most part, goofballs. So when a group of said goofballs decide to post a ridiculous Facebook page proposing sexual domination over all Grade 8 girls at a high school, I don’t think the RCMP are required. I think a lecture about maturity and social graces is in order and the loss of prophylactic vending machine privileges.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that teen violence against women (and men) isn’t a real concern and we need systems and laws in place to deal with the issue. But teenage boys posting messages on the 21st century’s equivalent of the bathroom wall doesn’t require police, school officials and politically correct social and behavioral counselors to wade in and make it all better. Ms. Roberts group presented the Grade 8 girls with a program on sexual boundaries entitled “My Body is not Your Playground“. No, I’m not making this up. She also stated that not all Grade 11 and 12 boys should be branded as predators. Thanks Anita…you’re the best.

The Surrey School District sent out letters to the families of Grade 8 girls on May 6 and to Grade 11 and 12 boys on May 10. School principal Allan Buggie said “Through Facebook and in discussions with a few students, as well as police, it was learned that a small group of senior boys were making a ‘game’ of sorts to try to seduce Grade 8 girls. I need to emphasize that nothing untoward has been happening at the school in this regard and it’s not known how many of our senior boys or Grade 8 girls may have actually been involved in any way with this activity.” I’m guessing that, like the RCMP, Mr. Buggie is probably far too busy running his school to comment about this silly situation but hey, that’s why he’s paid the big bucks, right?

It was also reported that Grade 11 girls at Lord Tweedsmuir High School said it is commonplace for older students to make passes at younger girls (which I’m guessing are wholly rejected by the vast majority of intelligent and socially aware students). Is it just me or is all of this beyond bizarre? What the hell is happening out there? And what the hell has happened to childhood? Why is there always a group of adult P.C. wankers ready to turn an insignificant and laughable situation into a full blown media event?

And to the horn-dog students who posted the Facebook page that caused all the hub-bub I can only say that being a teenager wasn’t always so difficult. I certainly don’t condone your behaviour but once upon a time school teachers and administrators actually remembered what it was like to be a teenager themselves.

R&O

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